A Testimony Of Answered Prayer.
Share Your Testimony of God's Love.
"And they overcame him by the Blood of the Lamb and by the word of their Testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death."
Rev. 12: 11.
Click on the above image
to enter forum.
My name is Vicki, born in Pennsylvania in September, 1968. In my short life I had endured quite a bit of abuse; I had been raped by a male acquaintance of my mother's at age 5, then verbally, physically and sexually abused by my older brother from ages 7 to 17, and raped twice by an uncle at age 19.
As a result of the sexual abuse and violence that occurred, it led me into a path of destructive behavior and a life of utter confusion and feelings of inadequacy.
I firmly believe that due to the abuse and sexual violence endured, it resulted in me dealing with many problems and psychiatric issues.
From an early age I struggled with feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, anger and hatred toward men. As a child I was in therapy, a bed-wetter, had strong desires to be a boy and often dressed as a boy. As I entered her teens, I endured a sexual identity crisis, dealt with self-destructive behavior, developed anorexia and bulimia, was an alcoholic, dabbled in drugs, was in and out of therapy and entered the Marines.
By early adulthood I was causing self-inflicted injuries on my body as a way of coping, in Eating Disorder Units, psychiatric hospitals, dealt with suicidal tendencies, bouted with numerous suicide attempts, was diagnosed with a chemical imbalance, psychiatric disoredrs, clinical depression and Borderline Personality Disorder (BDP).
By age 25 I had self-injured my body by cutting and burning (1, 5" scar & 1, 4" scar from 3rd degree burns & over 250 scars from cutting). I had been involved in various relationships, led a homosexual lifestyle, was in a gang, had an abortion, claimed bankruptcy due to high medical bills, was on psychotherapeutic medication (17 pills daily), had battled with mental illness and was in and out of psychiatric hospitals.
As I approached 27, I was dependent on psychotherapeutic medications, totally exasperated and felt as though I was just existing and taking up space. She was at a point in her life where she was looking for her life to change.
Although I thought I had tried everything possible to get better, I was still open for help. It seemed that whatever I tried that it was only good for a few hours, a day, sometimes if I got "lucky" it lasted a couple days.
One Sunday in March of 1995 I was invited to church and reluctantly went. It was my first time going to a church in over 15 years, and this was no church like I had ever been to. From the moment I stepped through the doors, I sensed something different.
When I walked into that church in Florham Park, NJ I remember sensing such love and peace.
(I honestly thought it would be over once I left) I wasnít quite sure what my beliefs were, mainly Agnostic, as I spent most of my life blaming God or questioning to him why all this happened to me.
I was at a point of my life where I was not ready to be let down again.
All I knew was that when I walked into that church, I felt great and didnít remember feeling so much peace like that before. And I knew it was real. No medication made me feel this alert and alive, I knew it was real.
I wanted so much to be normal but had no clue how to do it, as everything esle I tried proved a failure. After going to that church I asked God to make himself real to me. Within days I had noticed that I was more peaceful and desires that I had were not so strong. Even though it seemed so small of a change, for me it was big just to see a change, at that moment I knew that God was real!
A few weeks later, I bought a Bible and it opened right up to the book of Mark, and I began reading in chapter 5. As I read, I saw that a guy who had cut himself day and night and appeared to have mental illness; he was healed by Jesus. I became very agitated with God and threw the Bible to the floor. I just didnít understand why I wasnít well; if he had healed this guy so long ago.
I began to yell at God: ď!@#* you God, if you are real, then why the hell canít you help me? Why canít you do for me what you did years ago for that guy? Iím tired so tired of this !@#*, and tired of living this way. Donít you understand that Iím tired of crying all night long, cutting and drinking because I cannot cope? Life isnít supposed to be this way. I donít want mental illness. Please help me.Ē
I do realize now that swearing to God may not have been the best thing, but at that time I wasnít accustomed to talking with Him and tried my best to be nice. After saying this, I pleaded with God, I truly petitioned him for his help.
I figured my last resort was this God who I wasnít even so sure about. I put all my doubts aside and immediately I began to pray to God, actually I challenged him that I wanted answers and that I would give him 3 weeks to ďprove himselfĒ to me. Even though I wasnít sure if I believed in God, I thought it would be a good idea if I at least put my efforts into it. I wanted my life to change and was looking for a difference.
I figured that I had done everything possible that I guess I could at least give God a chance. It seemed as if nothing else had worked, but I have never thought of including God because I mainly blamed God, part of me thought that what happened to me was His fault. Additionally, part of me wasnít convinced that he even existed. I wasnít sure what I believed in, not even certain about God.
I "challenged" God and my life has never been the same! Within days I noticed that I was more peaceful, able to think clearly and the negative desires she had were not so strong.
What happened over the next 1 1/2 years was absolutely breathtaking! With the love and mercy of God I learned to cope with the past and look forward to the future; there is hope and there is a better way of life. I learned that I donít have to live my future based on my past. I am not sure why all that happened to me did, but I do know that what was meant for bad is now being turned around for good.
I have completely healed, recovered and overcome in every area! I was married to a wonderful Christian man in April, 1999.
It is my hopes that every person will come to the realization that they can overcome anything in their life, as nothing is hopeless!
Whatever a person has gone through or may be facing right now, they can get through it just like I did and lead a normal healthy life as God intended for them!
God will heal you, strengthen you and take care of your every need.
Delivered from the Hurt of Abuse and the Scars of Sin.
My Testimony of God's Amazing Grace.
By: Shelia Holcomb.
Before I begin my testimony I feel it is important to give you some information on my childhood, so you will be better able to understand some of the decisions I made in my life, however stupid they may have been. But every decision I have made during my lifetime good or bad is what has brought me to where I am now and I am very thankful for the mountains and the valleys.
When I was born my mother was only fifteen years old and now years later and after I went through the process of forgiving her and working through many things, I am now able to look at her life through her eyes to try to better understand how she must have felt. Someone gave me this advice when I was really struggling with all of this, I was told that maybe I could forgive easier if I try to see her life through her eyes and not the eyes of a hurt child, you know what, it worked, I can understand her more clearly now. She was not mature enough to take care of herself much less a baby. So she would send me here and there to whomever would willing to take me at that particular time, most of the time it was my grandmother, several times throughout my life she would decide that she wanted me back and she would come and uproot me again. I never really knew any stability in my life and I always felt as if no one really loved me or wanted me.
Then at the age of nine she came and got me and took me away from my grandmother which, really at this point of my life, was the only mother I had ever known and I was very attached to her. Anyway, my mother came and took me to Illinois where she lived, by this time she had remarried and she had two more children by her new husband. He hated me and the only reason I could figure out was simply that I was not his child. Now this was not my fault, although I did blame myself for many years. He started just physically abusing me, but at the age of nine that changed, he raped me and this abuse went on until I was thirteen and I finally told my mother, she didn't believe me, actually no one believed me. Finally I just let it drop and I buried all of those feelings of anger and hate for years, that has now all been dealt with and forgiven and now it is all under the precious blood of Jesus, Praise God. I told my mother that I wanted to go back to Memphis to live with my grand mother and she consented just because she felt I was causing so much trouble and she did not want to be bothered.
Now my grandmother was now also remarried and I resented him for taking her away from me too. You must remember I was only a child and I felt like she was all I had and now I had lost her too. I was very hateful to him and caused so many problems, he was very kind and loving to me but I just could not accept what he was offering to me. My grandmother finally after a long struggle went to the courts and told the judge that I was out of control and they just could not handle me any longer, so they removed me and placed me in a foster home, the home I went to was wonderful, but at that time I could not see things clearly, all I could see was that the only person who should love me had now turned her back on me as well, I just wanted my grandmother so, I ran away. The courts then really called my bluff, so as a ward of the State of Tennessee I was placed in a Catholic all girls reform school for three and a half years. Now as I look back, I can honestly say it was one of the best things that ever happened to me. But at that time all I could see was that I was totally alone, unloved and unwanted in this great big world.
Now I will jump ahead some. In 1987 I lost my three children to their father and I totally lost it. I turned heavily to alcohol and eventually that turned into crack and cocaine. By this time I had lost everything including my dignity as I had turned to prostitution to support my drug habit. I was arrested several times on various charges, but I was never convicted and I never served any time, I know that God was taking care of me even back them in my sin, He saw what I would be one day in Him. I give GOD all the PRAISE, HONOR AND GLORY for all that I am today and all that I will be.
The drugs and my roaming had taken me to many places but on December 20, 1990 I came across a man that told me about Jesus and how He could deliver me and make my life an example to others. I had not eaten in a couple of days and he asked me if I was hungry, so he took me to a restaurant and bought me something to eat. The entire time he shared about Jesus Christ with me. He told me Christ could and would set me free if I was willing, and how He (Jesus), would give me a new life without all the pain and turmoil I was living in. Of course being a Christian does not eliminate us from pain, trials and tribulation but with Christ in our hearts He will give us the strength to overcome and withstand even in the worst times. I began sharing my life story with this man and he still said Jesus is the answer, and boy was he right. Right there I gave my heart to the Lord and I decided to live for Him and serve Him for the rest of my life.
I had been singing for many years and I had destroyed my voice through drug abuse, I just abused the gifts that God had given me. So I prayed and told the Lord that if He would heal and restore my voice I would use this gift for His glory for the rest of my life. Now, God has done exceedingly and abundantly above all that I could ask or think. The songs that I sing and others that I have written they are all His I am only an instrument holding the pen. It does not matter where you are, Christ will come to you and meet you if, you are willing to let your life go and let Him be God of and in your life.
I have had so many miracles in my Christian life as I am a walking miracle myself. One of these miracles really stands out to me and I would like to share this with you as well. About four or five years ago I was diagnosed with an incurable bowel condition, the doctors were not real sure what it was exactly, but they had come to the conclusion that with ulcers all through my body and many in my bowel system, they said they wanted to do surgery and remove some of the bowel. My reply was that I wanted to get prayer for this and that I believed that God was going to heal me and I will not need the surgery at all. They went ahead and scheduled me for another scope the following week, just a few days after Christmas. Then on Christmas Eve I placed a long distance call to a minister friend of mine and asked him to pray for me, he said no problem but he would need to call me back in a few minutes. While waiting for him to call back I got about ten bibles and placed them opened on the floor in a circle and one opened in the middle of the circle. When he called me back I knelt on the bible in the middle and said, "pray". When he prayed for me the fire of God hit me and went through me, I had such a peace come over me. I went over to my bed and fell asleep (now Adam was put into a deep sleep in Genesis when God removed the rib to create woman) God did the same for me as I lay there sleeping He performed surgery on me to heal my body. I slept for seventeen hours and when I woke the bleeding had stopped and so had the pain, I knew without a doubt that I was healed by the precious hand of the Master. I was on about $400.00 worth of medicine a month and I went into the kitchen and threw it all in the trash. I did go back for the scope when I was scheduled and the doctors were amazed there were no ulcers anywhere and I just praised God for His healing power.
I am now an ordained minister and I am married to a wonderful man who is also a minister. We know God has put us together for a ministry and we are enjoying serving the Lord together. I am now a southern gospel singer\songwriter. The Lord has blessed me and I will continue on this road He has placed me on for my desire is only to serve Him. I will travel anywhere I am invited to give my testimony or to sing or both. God is wonderful and it is to His glory that I am writing this, if one soul is reached in any way then this is worth everything.
Again I cannot stress enough that this is for the glory of God that I am here and that my life is what it is today, for without Christ we are nothing, but through Him we are joint heirs with Him. He is our Deliverer, Savior, Helper, and Healer and any problem we may have is never to great for Him to help us, we just have to take it to Him and leave it at His feet and in His care. I thank God for His power is still healing, still saving and still delivering. He is good all the time. I have made my mistakes but His grace is sufficient. God loves us and if we truly repent and confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
If we can help anyone out there, please contact us at the information provided below and we will do our best to help in any way we can. If you have questions about loved ones who may be on drugs or other addictions we will try to answer your questions, if we do not know we will do our best to find the answer for you. If you have loved ones that you need prayer for we will gladly join you in agreeing for that person for the Kingdom. Please always remember we are human and we will make mistakes but just confess to God those mistakes and get them under the blood of Jesus as soon as possible, God still loves us and He will help us in all of our situations. So many have asked me about my children, they are all very close to me now even though they live far from me, my oldest daughter is in canada with her husband and their son, my baby girl is in memphis tenn, and she has two little girls that are beautiful and my son is in miss. with his wife and they have a son and another one on the way, my husband and I also have several adopted children and one lives here in texas by us and plans to marry she does have a 6 year old son who keeps us all on our toes. I just wanted to let everyone know that when God restores He does a great job.
GOD BLESS AND KEEP YOU ALL. I GIVE FULL PERMISSION TO ANYONE WHO CAN USE THIS TESTIMONY TO COPY IT AND GIVE IT OUT OR TO SHARE IT PUBLICALLY, BUT PLEASE GIVE ALL THE GLORY AND PRAISE TO GOD. THANK-YOU. WE ARE YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER IN CHRIST JESUS.
Jerry & Shelia Holcomb
Feel free to email us at:
Page added 12th. October. 2002.
Tune.... The Worship Song.